So far I have attempted to describe a situation that promotes violence, and particularly violence towards women.
I have talked about how we live in a society that is distanced from nature, and how that distance from nature tends to escalate violence. I have talked about how the media presents a distorted image of women and how the media objectifies everything it deals with, especially men, women, and children. How the media uses little girls as potential sex objects, and young (white) women dressed up as little girls. I then talked about the isolation of men in our society, and how that isolation allows the secret of domestic violence to flourish.
I would now like to put this puzzle together as I see it in my minds eye.
By living in a society that sociolgically promotes violence in men, and a society that is dis-connected from nature to the extent that we, are we are planting the seeds of violence at a very young age.
If we then take these young men and women that are sociologically programmed towards violence and expose them to the media with all of its glorification of violence, we are adding fuel to an already roaring fire.
Then we have the issue of isolation to add to this puzzle. Intertwined with the isolation is the concept of keeping the secrets. If a man batters his wife, or girlfriend, and she does not or can not tell her community what happened IT WILL HAPPEN AGAIN.
In a society where men are physically and emotionally isolated from other men there are fewer repercussions for their behavior. If a violent man does not hear from other men that what he is doing is not OK, what is to help him change his behavior?
It is imperative that men stand up and let it become known that the violent treatment of women and children is not acceptable. Men are the perpetrators of most of the violence towards women and children, and MEN are the ones that can change the tides.
It is also critical that the survivors of assault break the silence. That can be so hard to do, I know, but it is critical. We must break the silence and start to deal with domestic violence, and sexual assault. If someone shares their experience with you ~ listen. Do not minmize the effect on her (or his) life, or "blame" her or him for being assaulted. Validate her (or his) reality. Let them know that you believe them and help them find a way to deal with this.
It is also very important to learn how to defend ones self, male or female.
In the final critical instant there is only one person you can depend on to save your life ~ YOURSELF
And make no misunderstanding about the fact that you ARE in a fight for your life. Physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. If you are involved in a violent relationship the violence will only increase. YOU must stop the violence. You may need to leave, immediately. But one way or another, you must get out of that relationship, or alter it to the extent that physical, and or sexual violence cannot happen. Contact a battered woman's shelter, call a rape crisis hotline, but do something to get help and to start to break the silence.